Everyone called her Bill

My mother's name is Clotilde (clo-tild) but everyone calls her Bill. Mama is 82 and for the most part in really good health. Heart is good, memory is fine, if you take into consideration Mama is 82. She smokes like a chimney and sees no reason to quit at this time in her life. She has a little COPD from smoking for 60 years and shakes a little but other than that she is doing good. The problem is MAMA is dieing. Not from heart problems , cancer, COPD...MAMA is dieing from sadness. It seems so strange to say that and makes my heart sad when I read it.

Mama is tall (5'11') and has always been thin like a model. She had an olive complexion that required not makeup and hair so black it look purple. She was beautiful. She was a stay at home Mom and was the Room Mother at school. She made our clothes and crochet doilies and throws. She never wore pants until 1957 when we went to France and wore spike heels that made her even prettier. She was by all accounts Harriet Nelson or the Beaver's Mom.

Her and POP ( my Dad) were married 47 years when Pop died and I think that was the day MAMA quit living. She sat down on the couch, lit a cigarette and has not gotten up. For the last 13 years we have lost MAMA a little each day. She lost interest in her church (she still goes every Sunday) but is no longer involved. Most of her's and Pop's friend have passed away so she has no friends. She lives on junk food ( cookies,ice cream, etc) and is down to 97 pounds. We thought it might be something health related but the Dr. said it is sadness. Depression really does kill you.

How sad will my life be when both my parents are gone.